Category: Lists

I was watching a documentary about the drummer of Hole, Patty Schemel, titled “Hit So Hard”. It featured a lot of Courtney Love screen time. Though the movie wasn’t really about her, she wasted no time inflating her significance in the context of women in rock and roll. It’s depressing to think that she is the token go-to reference for female modern rock singers. Here is a list of better role models:

Long songs are dumb. If you’re in a band and contemplating making a 10 minute epic, don’t. 99.9999% of the time it will suck. While you’re jamming away in your 4 minute guitar solo, or screaming along to your 12th chorus; I can tell you that no one is really paying attention and all of the interest is synthetic.

In keeping with festivus tradition, I will list my favorite musical releases of the passing year, say how they have disappointed me, and then crawl back into my cave.

In the world cup of rock n roll, England and America are the typical leaders. In distance second we have Australia, Sweden, Canada, and Ireland. The English speaking countries seem to have the advantage, which makes sense since rock originates from the English speaking world and culturally moves outward. I don’t know why Sweden excels so well, probably has something to do with the socialist utopia they live in.

It’s been an interesting year. Many of our childhood heroes have let us down by dropping sub-par material that will ruin their nostalgia riddled live show for years to come. That being said, along with some good new bands, some older bands have come out of left field with their best music to date.

I’ve often caught myself saying that EPs are better than LPs. While probably being a bit of an exaggeration, I do often find that a quick sampling of songs serve some bands better then the long form of an album. With albums the band often runs out of A-list material and has to resort to filler and gimmicks. The EP is a nice middle ground between the album and the single; giving you more then just a brief taste, but not so much that you’re full.

There are some bands who I feel have released their best material on EPs, which unfortunately often cripples them in the public’s eye because we focus so much on the album and often pass over the EPs.

I always admired bands that end clean, bands that don’t stretch their stay in the limelight. When they run out of ideas they get out of the way for fresh minds with new sounds. F.T. Marinetti said, in his manifesto of futurism:

Holy crap, the last time this blog was updated was for the ‘best music of 2012’! I don’t even really have an excuse, I’ve just been sitting around playing video games. Hopefully 2014 will feature more frequent updates (we have a few ideas on the back-burner…), we do plan to bring out of long-awaited-highly- anticipated-debut album in the next few months… so that’s something I guess.

Anyways like every year, I feel like this year is the worst year for music yet. I’m not gonna even go into it this time cause it just makes me feel old. Here are the few shreds of dignity we managed to find in this year’s turd pile: